A Two Button Day

I was a day behind and so I plucked two buttons out of the button jar ready to grab and run. I chuckled - a small sweet pink button and it's little sister a smaller sweet purple one. Both plain and simple and I thought to my self that this would be a plain and simple Natalie and Lauren missive. Not to be. 
I was camp nurse again this weekend for an event. I love this camp and love "running" the camp infirmary. It feels like home. I don't really run it of course - all nursing is team work, but I was " the buck stops here" nurse this summer and was proud of my efforts - except for a few mistakes and that one day I cried and cried. Still, wowser, it was a wild run. BUT... there were some pretty strong signs that it wasn't a healthy place for a repeat performance. Hear the ambivalence??? The pink button, or the purple button? Hmmmm.
The 24 hour stint was mostly gonna be bandaids and paperwork - inventory for next year - or the next nurse and it turned out to be good bye. One of the bosses, a good man I think, confronted me about my intentions and took me unaware. I held my own without being confrontational but after the conversation knew, deep in my heart, that the packing up was more than boxes and bags. A few more booboos, a hand full of Advil, and one puker and the gig was over.
And then the gifts arrived. I rode around the magnificent grounds on a bright and breezy day with a young man I have come to love. Good fortune rounded up his crew as we crisscrossed the yard. All the golf carts came to a halt. We gazed at one another and I began to talk. They listened. "You are amazing young men and women" I told them. "Your light is bright and beautiful when you work together to bring joy to others. You are kind and smart and fun and funny. You are talented beyond measure and you watch out for one another like few others. Make good choices. Don't chose what you know over what is possible. Let your hearts guide you. Stick together. And thank you. Thank you for including me, for the respect, the appreciation, the rides out and about in the beauty that is camp. Be well. This is good bye." We hugged, big, generous bear hugs.  Our eyes were bright with emotion but our smiles were brighter.
The pink button and the purple button and I walked to the car with a light heart. Both are beautiful, the past and the future.