The 43rd day of 42 days - Success - or failure?

43 days ago I started on a journey with a committment to myself to live the next 6 weeks intentionally with a few goals thrown in.
Well, today is the day after  - and so a little reflection is called for.

I had "intended" to structure my time to be more productive and get some things  off  " THE LIST ".
So what did I do - and what didn't I?

I did not read the Bible every day.
I did not walk my dog every day.
I did not excercise every day - or any day that I can remember.
I did not loose 26 pounds, or 20  or even 2.
I did not manage to keep up with the lawn or the garden or the house.
I did not post a blog post everyday of 42  days.

And so, I can call this promise to myself a broken promise  ------

or

I can look at what I DID do.

I DID walk with the Lord every step of everyday or 42 days
I DID give my dog abundant love and attention.
I DID keep moving and tend this achy body and all the needs it had in this heat wave.
I DID NOT gain any weight - that's something.  That's alot actually.
I DID post as I felt called.
I DID pick sugar snap peas and black caps with the kids and the tomatoes and squash are ripening before our very eyes amidst the weeds.
and most importantly I DID live intentionally, making active choices and taking stock of them as I went along.

Here is what else I DID do.

I did travel to Virginia with my oldest son Billy to help the next son and his wife prepare to move to Italy for three years with the military.
While I was there I did get to celebrate Lorelai's 6th birthday.
I did drive to Pennsylvania to get Axel, the olderst grandchild for a few weeks in NY with this part of his family.
I did grumble about wet towels and such but also played and enjoyed the company of one heck of a teenager.  I did take him to the lake to show him how to row a boat on the most amazing of blue skyed days.
I DID drive to  New Jersey and hug a son returned from duty in Bahrain and while there
I DID baptize Lorelai Elizabeth and Jonah Rosario into the fellowhip of God's family among generations of family who love them.
I did, help paint and restore the fellowship hall in the basement of our church and I did recognize that Olivia was a way better choice to wield a paint brush than I am and I am right about that  - she is doing a great job. I DID tell her that.
I DID ask for help when I needed it to get me through a financial crisis and I honored my agreement with the person who helped.
I did send cards of support to a dear friend's brother who is facing his own demons with grace and dignity.
I did attend my Aunt's memorial service and visit with the grandelders of my father's side of the family.
I did sit with a family at the bedside of a great lady who was preparing to die and help them wade the deep dark waters of saying good bye. 
I did set up tables and help with flowers and brew real iced tea and doctor real lemonade and witness that good bye.
I did gather blueberry bush trimmings to adorn the flower arrangements for the friend who could not be there but who's memories are from the garden time shared with our friend.
I did speak my heart as the Holy Spirit led and hopefully open the path for supporting a new widow who is older than I am but whose loss is the greater for the number of years she was with her beloved.
I did stay gracious as another mother whose feelings are hurt set about to hurting my daughters feelings on a special day for her.
I did celebrate with family as we prepare to welcome the newest grandchild into our family.
I did get time with three little darlings so their mommas could rest up and get ready for yet another special day.
I did make 8 dozen deviled eggs for these various events
And I did say "have a great day " as the kids headed out to Zoom Flume  - and I  DIDN'T go along.

So, my house is a mess, the lawn is overgrown the garden has more weeds than anything, my Bible is unopened, my dog and I are fat and lazy, but.....

The DIDs win!! and they win by a landslide.  The didn'ts matter and they stay on the list, but the did's add up to alot of living. Lordy, Lordy how many intenional and exceptional blessings have been packed into the last 42 days! Seems like success with a little failure thrown in, not the other way around.

What's next?  Well, as I look at my calendar I count and I see that this baby is due about 42 days from now and that gives me hope that the 42 days from now til then can be jampacked with the didn't get toos and the wanna do's. 

Follow along - I may just blog about it.

Day Thirty of Forty Two

Tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow.
Fourteen days ago, on Day 16, I posted on my blog page that I would resume my daily posts  - tomorrow. 

Thirteen tomorrows have come and gone, and no posts. How does that happen?  How does tomorrow turn in to today and become yesterday without our promises to ourselve being fulfilled?

That is part of this 42 Day process for me.  Determining where I go off course? what is it that truly Matters to me and why it is not on the top of the list of accomplishments every single day without fail?

This is what I know at this moment in time.

On each of those thirteen days there was joy.  I had some fun along the way. 
On each of them I made some good choices - and some poor ones - and one or two downright bad ones. I hurt a few feelings and had mine hurt too, but there was awareness and forgiveness and laughter and love left us all in a good place to try again - with courage.
On each of them I had good company and enjoyed their presence on my journey of life, I laughed out loud and said I love you in a million ways to those most important to me.

This is what else I know.
I took a crisis of sorts ( no worry for me or us needed   - an easy crisis in the crisis heirarchy ) for me to honor my determination to walk this journey in complete and total faith in the Lord.
That crisis lead me to gratitude not despair - thanks to my many friends and wonderful family.
My garden, which was to be THE THING I WAS DOING, has as many weeds as flowers - but - it is florishing with black caps that are divine and the sugar snap pea crop was delicious and those plants are pulled making room for another promise space.  - or more weeds depending.....
I weigh the very same as I did when I started so I am no closer to my weight goal than on Day One- but no farther away either .  A  draw on the scale but a dissapointment none the less.

And this is the most important thing I know.  Today is a new day. The weather is giving us a little break, and the sun is shining.  I am loved and I have many to love in return. I am blessed.

And, it is only Day Thirty - twelve to go.  See you tomorrow .